I am about to offer you some very good advice.
Do something about your hair, man!
The less time people spend fascinated by the wildly complex, multi-facetted
assemblage on top of your head, the more time they’ll be able to focus on the
words and thoughts coming out of your mouth. (Yes, we all see that you've
made some progress along those lines, but it's not enough.)
I offer you this advice because, even if I did find myself agreeing with some of
the things you say, I can not—honestly—imagine voting for you. And it's all
because of that hair.
When I was fourteen, back in 1963, Billy Kelmer had a haircut like that, and
he looked like a complete idiot. Of course Billy was 13 at the time, and he
wasn't running for President.
(If you need any more advice, please send me an email. firstname.lastname@example.org)
|100% OF ALL PROFITS FROM THE SALE OF EARWIG
WILL GO TO DARRYL MOCKRIDGE'S POOR DESERVING WIFE'S
RELOCATION AND WELL-EARNED RETIREMENT FUND.
|I've already offered you more